November 11,1997 

What we see is that there is a drive for perfection, and that it is assumed from parental, ancestral influences where perfection is deemed more worthy than imperfection. Then, of course, the child who feels that they are growing and learning and not able to do things perfectly begins to assume and draw conclusions about themselves that they are yet imperfect, and therefore inferior, less than, or not as good. That is covered up inside and then the body begins to adapt around consciousness. 

Often the intestines and the colon are the areas where the concept of self illustrates itself. It represents how much are you able to receive about the truth of who you are. If you are also receiving what is not the truth of who you are, then the subtle judgments that are received begin to affect digestion. Assimilation - do you assimilate what is the truth, or do you assimilate what is not the truth? On the right side often times it is something that is an efforting to make the imperfect perfect, or trying to put on a good show, so to speak. Ask the question: which parent did this, or was it both?

You need to open to the level of causality, as you have already suspected. To do this with someone else frees your subconscious aspect to be more fluid and more able to respond. You are working particularly with the second chakra and the root. It is the hiding place, it is the place of the unconscious child. The child will not respond unless there is a sense of dialogue and acknowledge of who you truly are. Often times another person joining you without any pre-judgments about who you are can serve as the witness, and the child will feel safe to come forward and begin say “I do exist - help this one within me to see me, to feel me, to name me, and to assist me to know what is true and what is not”. Those who work on the esoteric, causality levels with those programs of consciousness would be helpful to you.

Your husband’s energy influences you only so much as you play out parental patterning with him. There is, perhaps, not an awareness of that other level, and that is contributing to the experience within the relationship. He is not to blame.

Continue to be very diligent in your own process so that you learn and then free yourself from those places where you have been driving yourself to present, in a sense, your greater self before the little one has joined you. Your powerful presence is one where others can receive from you quite easily, quite directly because you have a very direct manner, and yet there is an efforting within you that is part of the discrepency within the unconscious, yet. When that has merged, when the inner and the outer come together without the judgment in-between, then there will be a much greater ease in your expression in the world. You will reconfigure it so that there is a way in which your subtle, protective influences no longer keep you apart from others who, perhaps, you will join with one day to co-create something that will be even much more fun and much more inclusive of the whole of your work. 

I HAVE A FRIEND WHO HAS DEALT WITH HER CHILDREN BY HERSELF MOST OF THEIR LIVES. THEY ARE GROWN BUT STILL DEPEND ON HER. SHE FEELS THERE IS NO REASON TO CONTINUE LIFE BECAUSE IT WILL ONLY BE MORE OF THE SAME. SHE IS NOT SUICIDAL, BUT HAS HEART PROBLEMS AND DOESN'T WORK ON HERSELF. I FEAR FOR HER. I WANT HER TO GET THE HELP SHE NEEDS BUT I UNDERSTAND HER FEELING OF HOPELESSNESS ALSO (I LOST MY HUSBAND). WHAT CAN I TELL HER? 

When ones have lived their lives through others there is then a sense that if they no longer need you in the same way or they leave, then there is not much to life, why live it, etc. The truth is that she has not lived yet, and you are beginning to sense that perhaps you have not fully lived yet, as well. What if you chose life for yourself? What if you allowed your own individuated nature to create experiences that would fulfill your heart in a whole different way than living with or through another whose heart you were focused on fulfilling?

There is much more to life than you can even imagine. It is an adventure of soul embodied. Those who have left this life before finding out that that was possible have not been able to illustrate, so then the other side looks more tempting. What if you choose life and you try the optimal experience of your soul embodied? As long as you have a body the choice is there for you. You might begin to realize that leaving this life is not the optimal choice or the most tempting choice, but living fully and deepening within the experience of the beauty that is possible within creation - your creation, the wonder and the joy. You will find that there is much to learn, much to explore, and much to live, but that is your choice. 

DONNA HAS BEEN SUFFERING SINCE THE END OF FEBRUARY AND WE ARE NO CLOSER TO A DIAGNOSIS. WHAT SHOULD WE DO NEXT?

As we look to this one we see that she has a very very tenuous life-force connection through the root chakra to the earth. Her soul is largely out of her body, so her soul is not assisting her body to do the turnaround or the healing that is possible. She needs to be asked in a very direct way if she is choosing life or not. If she is, then the assistance she needs is to have a spiritual healing to call her soul back into her body and to reconnect her with the earth. That will bring more charge, more energy into her body to assist her physical body to not feel abandoned, and to then reasset its integrity. She needs to be asked on a very conscious level if she wishes to have life or not.

I LIVE IN LONDON, ENGLAND. I AM A STUDENT AT THE LONDON SCHOOL OF ECONOMICS, AND I AM TRYING TO FIND LIKE-MINDED PEOPLE (OTHER THAN ON THE INTERNET). SO FAR I HAVE NOT MET ANYONE I FEEL SAFE WITH. WHAT CAN I DO? WHERE SHOULD I GO?

In England there are many many people who are opening to the consciousness and to evolving and healing. You have not yet found them partly because the atmosphere you are working in and going to school in has focused on the current world as it is known and continues to believe it can be effective in that way. 

Spiritualist churches originated in England, and there are those who perhaps would be linkages to others. There are healing centers all over, but perhaps more so in places like Glastonbury, or out in some of the other areas, but they are in London as well. Walk into one of them. Find out through the Spiritualist churches or metaphysical bookstores, but find out and walk into one of them and begin to just see who is there. See what your soul begins to align and arrange for you and who your soul begins to bring you into contact with. Primarily it is a placement problem. You have to be in the right places a little bit more to open the doors that are there for you. They are there.

MY HUSBAND IS DISTURBED THIS EVENING. I'M NOT SURE IF IT'S MORE RIGHT TO TELL HIME WHAT I'M FEELING ABOUT THE EARTH CHANGES, OR KEEP MY MOUTH SHUT. ANY THOUGHTS?

Your feelings about the earth changes may yet want to open to some more perspective. Do not share with another from fear. Share with another from an awareness that there is a great shifting of consciousness taking place that also influences the experience of earth. Earth is primarily the one that is making possible the shift of consciousness. So for you there is opening to what that truly means. Open to greater awareness of what this shifting of consciousness within earth means for you, and how that then might affect your voices. 

Your husband is one who likes to have proof of things. It is difficult to prove this, and yet if you look around you see that there is a shifting taking place very quickly. There are ways in which you can align your belief, your sense or awareness, with actual happenings. But it is a way of seeing, it is a perspective. It is a different look at what is taking place. He has the possibility to open to those different perspectives, and yet proof in the way science has deemed the “right” way to proceed for evidence is largely based on fear. So it is difficult to prove anything to one who is in fear. However, the more it is true for you and you share from that place, the more then another senses there is no fear, and then fear has less power. 

I AM HAVING GREAT DIFFICULTY MAINTAINING CLARITY OF MIND. AT TIMES MY THOUGHTS SEEM DIFFUSED AND SCATTERED. MY MENTAL FOCUS OF ENERGIES IS OFTEN NOT SHARP AND DEFINED, BUT MISTY VISUALLY. I HAVE RECURRENT PAIN BETWEEN A SHOULDERBLADE AND SPINE WHERE I AM TOLD I HAVE OFFERED UP THAT SIDE REPEATEDLY TO INJURY. I HAVE BEEN UNSUCCESSFUL AT ALLOWING CELLULAR MEMORIES TO RELEASE. IS THERE SOMETHING I CAN DO TO HELP SELF IN THESE AREAS?

For you there is a way in which your unconscious is attempting to release those things you have asked for clearing. When your mind becomes less clear you are actually moving into the unconscious places. Go with it, go deeper. If you need to, ask for assistance from ones who can assist you to go into these places that you are seeking to go into. It is not just cellular memory, but it is memory from this life as well as others, but primarily you can begin here in this life. 

What was your mother like, in a sense, in her connection to you, and what was the infant’s and the child’s experience in your initial experience of love? Was it love unconditional or love conditional? Let yourself open these questions up, for your heart desires to have greater access to receiving love directly for you, the true inner nature, as well as to open your own beingness deeper into your body without any limiting conditions. 

Your mind is very fine, very wonderful, very clear most of the time, but it is not yet connected to the whole of your body, and then your mind can be asserting itself apart from your body and then it says “I am clear”. When you begin to merge with the unconscious in the body you say it is unclear, and you do not like it. Let yourself open to the places where the confusion is a doorway into your liberation. 

I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO LISTEN TO MYSELF, BUT I HAVE NOT HAD ANY SUCCESS. I MEDITATE, BUT MAYBE I THINK TOO MUCH AND DON'T LET MY MIND REST. WHAT SHOULD I DO TO IMPROVE MY MEDITATIONS? ALSO, SOMETIMES WHEN I'M CALM AND TRY ONLY TO LISTEN I HEAR AN "EEEEE" SOUND. WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS SOUND?

That is the pineal gland, the transmitter for light from the higher self, or crown area into the pituitary and the glands and the chemistry in the body. So that is your light frequency as you perceive it when you hear that high pitched sound.

Meditation is something that can be practiced, but it also needs to fit your nature. You are one whose mind is quite active. Your body wants to be active, as well. You are one who would benefit from exercise such as jogging or something that would utilize the sense of movement. That would then put you into another state of mind, either as you come back and relax afterward, or during. Present yourself a question, a specific area you wish to open to or dwell upon. Then as you are moving, or soon after when you are relaxing, let yourself stay open to thoughts. Thoughts that come to you are not just from your mind, but are an intuitive message that come through in little thought packets that are translated into consciousness. Trust these. Find your way. Your way may not be to sit quietly. Your way may be to move and to allow that movement to help you open and access that place. 

MY HUSBAND IS RECOVERING FROM A BONE MARROW TRANSPLANT DONE LAST YEAR. HE RECENTLY RECEIVED A REPORT THAT THERE IS SOMETHING SUSPICIOUS. IS THERE SOMETHING I CAN DO TO HEAL HIM? 

I HAVE READ MANY BOOKS ABOUT LIGHTWORK AND ANGELS AND NEW AGE AND CONVERSATIONS WITH GOD, AND EACH TIME I GET A NEW BOOK I NOD MY HEAD BECAUSE I ALREADY KNOW THIS. WHAT DIRECTION SHOULD I TAKE THAT WILL HELP ME APPLY WHAT I KNOW AND TEACH IT TO OTHERS? DRIVING TO WORK I KEPT ASKING MYSELF "WHO AM I". THEN I BEGAN TO ASK MYSELF, "WHO I AM". PLEASE HELP ME FIND OUT.

The books are helping you remember those things that your soul knows. When you link directly to the wisdom within your soul, then the wisdom does not just stay in a knowledge or knowing place, but begins to access the place of choice and action so that your knowing, your thought, the way you speak and the way you act are all in integrity within your life. It is time, perhaps, since you are asking us, to begin to trust when you feel an impulse from your body and your heart, that you can place your hands upon your husband and just allow the great energies of earth and Spirit to move thorough you and to be assisting him. 

When you feel as if you wish to speak to one and assist them to see another perspective on their life, or their problems, or the way they are feeling, do so. When you feel you are placed with one during your day and there is a connection or feeling of some kind that you recognize, open the door. If you need to deal with the fear that keeps you from acting upon what you know, then do so. 

It is all you, do you understand? It is not a “who am I”, because when you say “who am I” you wish to define yourself in a new way, perhaps, but it is more a matter of allowing yourself to experience the fullness that is truly limitless and undefinable and one with all that is. And that is who you are, so to speak. 
 

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